As
I am certain you are all aware, my husband, Sgt. Kevin Benderman,
was sentenced to 15 months confinement, loss of rank, forfeiture
of pay and a dishonorable discharge last week, the charge being
“Missing Movement” or failure to get on a plane. In
actuality, the charge was “filing a Conscientious Objector
packet against the recommendation of his commander, who had no
intention of allowing my husband to follow his conscience, and
therefore serving notice to the rest of our military that they
should not follow suit.”
I
need to assure you that I do not make this statement out of anger,
but rather by simply pointing to the facts. Not only did my husband’s
commander address this in a public comment to the media, the prosecutor
used this in his closing statements, and the military representative
was adamant about this in his public comments to the media immediately
following my husband’s court martial.
I
am not writing out of anger. I am writing to request the opportunity
to meet with one of you to discuss my husband’s case from
our point of view, as this has not been allowed to this point.
Even in my husband’s court martial, he was not allowed to
discuss his beliefs, his reasons, or the fact that he has given
10 years of honorable service to his country, including a combat
tour in Iraq, for which he received two Army commendation medals
for meritorious service.
My
husband’s case for Conscientious Objection was brushed aside
and mishandled so that his entire career of service came down
to a meeting with his Command Sgt. Major that lasted less than
one hour. My husband’s testimony regarding this meeting
has remained unchanged, as has my witness to that meeting. The
Command Sgt. Major’s testimony was re-written and sworn
to on at least 5 separate occasions, each testimony contradicting
another, even as they were presented in my husband’s court
martial.
In
fairness to each of you, to the US Army, to the people of this
country and mostly to my husband, who is paying the price for
being falsely charged, I am respectfully requesting that the appeal
process for his case be allowed to proceed without delay, and
that he be given fair treatment not only in a re-presentation
of the facts surrounding his court martial, but that he also be
given the opportunity to have his application for Conscientious
Objector status reconsidered as well.
We
are all living in difficult times. My husband served in this war,
and the effects it had on him will live with him for the rest
of his life. We do not intend to dishonor the service of all the
military personnel still serving, each will have to make the choice
for themselves of how to live with their beliefs and their conscience.
We
will not say that the beliefs of those still fighting are wrong.
We can only say for certain that what my husband was ordered to
continue to believe, by his command, is very wrong for him. This
is the United States of America, the land of the free and the
home of the brave. Sirs, my husband freely volunteered to serve
in the United States Army because he believed it was right. He
gave 10 years of honorable service because he believed it was
right for him. After seeing war firsthand, he knew that he could
not participate any longer; because he KNEW war was the wrong
choice for him.
The
stand he has taken, to say NO to war and to lay down his weapon
in the face of so many who do not understand, is what I believe
gives him the right to live in this “home of the brave,”
as one of the bravest. I have never met any of you. I hear what
others say about you, but I cannot say the same. I do not know
you.
I
would like the opportunity to know you, so that I could know what
to believe. I would like the opportunity to sit with each of you
and discuss what my husband believes, as people who care about
our country and those who serve it. Our country needs to heal.
War has divided our country, our families and our world.
I
would like the opportunity to present our views for a different
approach to lasting peace. We believe that we can make this country
strong on our shores, that we can develop ways to defend our country
without taking the fight to foreign lands. We believe that we
can work together to provide adequate means to secure our land
so that we will not have to “get to them before they can
get to us.” It will involve more than just coffee table
discussions, and we make no illusion, no doubt there will be loss.
As
we work through the process and remain firm in our commitment
to not allow ourselves to be drawn into violence, we know that
some will try to force us against our will, to show us to be weak
by daring us to lose control. BUT the loss incurred will be far
less than what we have already faced, and the innocents who now
suffer will not be so openly in harm’s way. Taking a stand
for what we believe, for a commitment to seeing that peace happens
and that those who threaten this peace are neutralized does not
have to involve weapons meant for killing.
Animals
on this earth were given their weapons; teeth, claws and a ravage
tenacity to protect what is theirs and keep “enemies”
at bay. Humanity was given something much different, a far more
significant weapon. Humanity was given a mind. Somewhere along
the way, we have forgotten the power of our mind and what it can
be used for.
It
became easy to create weapons of destruction, far easier than
to use our minds to think and create strong principles for preventing
the use of these weapons. We believe that we should take pride
in our abilities to use our mental strength. We believe that we
should develop this asset and work with courage toward peace by
drafting positive resolutions, knowing that while the implementation
of these resolutions will result in some loss, it will be far
less than the loss we face with weapons of destruction in our
hands, no different than “the enemy” facing us. We
believe we should stand strong and confident in knowing that we
have the courage of heart and strength of intellect to overcome
the basest animalistic tendencies that so easily drive us to forget
that we are human. We believe it is time to rise up from a position
of strength knowing that there is no “enemy” greater
than ourselves, when we lose respect for our God-given abilities
and resort to violence as an answer.
Our
world is divided because of war. We see children dying who will
never have the chance to grow to use their talents to help our
world. We see children who have lost their fathers. How will they
grow? Will there be resentment, or will they come to believe that
they must become strong in saying NO to war? We see mothers crying
as they reach out to find a noble cause for their sons’
deaths.
Wouldn’t
the cause be far nobler if the solution were to lay down our guns
and say, “not one more person should have to die when we
have the strength to resolve our problems without violence?”
We see homes destroyed, a country laid waste to, and people struggling
to survive. Will they one day say “thank you” for
making my world better because of war? OR “ will they find
forgiveness and reach out in hope when we put our weapons away
and give them the freedom to do what they must to heal their country
and their homes? This world is great and we are all part of it.
War
only creates chaos, it will never bring lasting peace, and fighting
with killing machines to keep the turmoil from reaching our shores
will only prolong the agony. We believe we must work together
to strengthen us, to secure us, and to use our strength wisely
to show the world that we mean business when we say that no one
will control us, our actions or our way of life.
To
take the stand of strength, to honor those who have served this
country with their sacrifices, we believe we must rise above the
violence and say “NO MORE,” we will not allow ourselves
to be drawn to a position of having to use their methods to resolve
our differences. Sirs, nothing that results in such massive destruction
can ever be counted as success on the way to lasting peace. Please
consider my request.
Please
understand that I mean no disrespect, nor does the stand that
my husband has taken. We care about our country, we care about
healing the wounds we all now feel. We know that our country stands
for human rights, for respecting others and for leading others
to their personal freedom by giving them the right to make the
choices that are best for them, as long as they bring no intentional
pain to anyone else. We believe it is time to reach out for what
makes us truly strong and to leave the way of violence behind.
I
look forward to the opportunity to discuss my husband’s
case with you. Mostly, I look forward to the opportunity to work
together in strength, to bring lasting peace to our world, and
to see our country represented by the confidence of a principled
stand for conscience that all people deserve.
In
Peace,
Monica
Benderman
Monica
Bendermen can be reached at: mdawnb@coastalnow.net.